From the Mouths of Babes

Quote Monday contemplates death

/ Shane / Leave a comment

Me: “…and then you’ll REALLY be a big boy.”
Ollie: “And then after I’m a big boy, I’ll turn into a daddy.”
Me: “And what will you be after you’re a daddy?”
Ollie: “A grandpa.”
Me: “And what will you be after you’re a grandpa?”
Ollie: “A dead grandpa. And after that I’ll be a worm.”

Ollie: “When I’m dead, they might take my heart out through my mouth.”
::Me staring at him blankly::
Sara: “We had this talk about mummies…”

Sara: “I totally could go for another doughnut.”
Me, discretely holding up 4 fingers and glancing at the kids: “I can’t help but notice there is just the right amount.”
Sara indicating just us adults: “…for us each to have 2 more.”

Evie: “Kiffffck. Kifffffsa.”
Evie: “What does that word say?”
Me: “KFC.”

Quote Monday gets quite rude

/ Shane / Leave a comment

Ollie: “When I toot when I’m talking, it sounds like I’m purring.”

Ollie: “Daddy, stop singing. I can’t hear my toots.”

Unnamed visiting child #1: “I like to eat my boogies. They taste like candy.”

Unnamed visiting child #2: “It looks like a corn popsicle!”
Me: “I was thinking that too.”
Unnamed visiting child #2: “We could call it copsicle. Or porn!”
Evie: “What’s porn?”

Quote Monday goes extinct in the blink of an eye

/ Shane / Leave a comment

Ollie: “…and there was a dinosaur that was stinky.”
Me: “Stinky?”
Ollie: “Yes, a stinky dinosaur.”
Me: “Extinct?”
Ollie: “An ex-stinky dinosaur.”

Evie: “Ollie, I need those scissors, just for a second. I’ll give them back in a blink of an eye.”
::Ollie gives her the scissors and she starts cutting::
Evie: “Okay, I’ll tell you when to blink your eye.”

Me: “Would you love me more if I magically turned into Aaron Rodgers?”
Sara: “No.”
Me: “You’re the only one.”

Quote Monday is “Wisconsin Fancy”

/ Shane / Leave a comment

Me: “Ollie you can’t hit your mama.”
Ollie: “I didn’t get any sleep today.”

::Me wearing my Packer pajama pants and a black sweater::
Evie: “Wow, you look fancy. You look like you’re ready for a Wisconsin wedding!”

::CD playing::
CD: “Orville needed his brother…”
Evie: “What does that one mean?”
Sara: “Well, there was this man who made popcorn…”
::Me, laughing hysterically::
Sara: “Ooooh, needed his BROTHER!”

You know, the lesser known Orville who invented flight, not the more famous popcorn magnate.

Sara: “I thought the song went, ‘Orville needed his butter’.”
Me: “I’m not sure that’s any better.”

Evie: “Oliver, which do you think you’ll cry more at; my wedding or my funeral?”

Quote Monday is afraid

/ Shane / Leave a comment

Evie: “I’m afraid.”
Me: “Afraid? Of what?”
Evie: “Astronauts.”

Ollie: “Mama, there’s lots of monsters out there in the fog. For real.”
Sara: “Did you have a discussion about this?”
Me: “No.”
Sara: “I don’t know why he’d say that.”
Me: “Because it’s freaking SCARY out there!”

I’m with Ollie on this one, that Maine fog is no joke man.

Evie: “If I had to make a painting for this museum, I would paint a woman standing next to a table, and on the table is a skeleton, and the lady is screaming. It would be called, There’s a skeleton on my table!”

Ollie: “I love you Pizza.” – Surprisingly, he’s not actually referring to food here. Ollie’s not too good with names, even for the people he loves, but he’s not afraid to just make up his own.