Evelyn has been wanting a kitten. I mean, like, REAAAALY wanting a kitten. Coincidentally, this happened to coincide with her taking on the role of cleaning the litter box. “I think she’s got toxoplasmosis,” said Sara after the 15th time Evelyn brought it up.

They were gearing up to write a “persuasive essay” in class, and Evelyn planned to persuade us to get a kitten. “The answer is no,” I said. “You can write whatever you want, but there is absolutely no chance you’re getting  a kitten.” (My dislike of our cat is well documented…I’ve been waiting for this thing to die for YEARS.)

She cried about it a couple of times (we weren’t being fair, we weren’t giving her persuasive essay a chance, yada yada), but nothing too unusual. So I was very surprised when her persuasive essay finally did show up, and it wasn’t about kittens!

Why I Should get a Bunny

Dear mom and dad,

You know I have wanted a pet of my own forever. You wouldn’t let me have a dog or a cat, but what about a bunny? I have several reasons why you should get me one. The first is that I would buy mostly everything myself, (except the cage). The second reason is that Nala was okay with Gus when we took him for a week. The third reason is that bunnies are quiet. Nala is always meowing but bunnies are quiet. Even if it makes some noise it would be in my room. The fourth reason is bunnies need little space than other pets. The fifth reason is bunnies are easily trained. Like going in the litter box not on the floor. They can do tricks too if you train them. The sixth reason is that bunnies are very clean animals. The seventh reason is they will eat our leftover vegetables. The eighth reason is nobody is allergic. The reason you should get me two is bunnies do better with bunny friends. The ninth reason is bunnies do better as indoor pets, so if we get a bunny from a shelter if would be good. The tenth reason is we don’t need to give it a bath. The eleventh reason is they are only awake dusk and morning and not in between. The twelfth reason is they can’t throw up! The thirteenth reason is they only need three hours of floor time. The fourteenth reason is I promise not to pick a bunny up. The fifteenth reason is I also promise not to get a baby bunny because baby bunnies need their mothers. The sixteenth reason is if I get tired of it or it doesn’t work out, [my teacher] said she would take it. The sventeenth reason why is I will cover up wires it woudl want to chew on. I also want to say that they coust about $20 at BinkyBunny.com, but at other places it costs up to $250 to buy a bunny. The eighteenth reason why is they don’t stink at all, PERIOD. Another side note. There is awesome cages at Clover.Forest.net, it costs about $50! So for all of these reasons get me a bunny please.

Yours truly,
Evelyn

She obviously felt very, very strongly about this, so we decided not to shut her down outright. Instead, she is going to take care of Ollie’s class rabbit for a month over the summer (our previous experience with this was pretty positive). She even spent two mornings interviewing Ollie’s teacher about the care and feeding of rabbits, so she’s pretty well prepared.

Say what you want about Evelyn, but she is EXTREMELY responsible. I have no doubt she will take excellent care of Chocolate Cuddlewuddles (yes, the rabbit is named Chocolate Cuddlewuddles…that’s what happens when you let kindergarteners vote), and I have no doubt that she will then turn that into a plea for either a rabbit, or a kitten.

Spoiler alert: when Nala dies, we’re not getting a rabbit or a kitten. We’re getting a break.