Fun Stuff

Search Term Roundup

/ Shane / 3 Comments

Here we have yet another search term roundup, in which I ruminate about the strangest Google search terms that have lead weary Internet wanderers to my doorstep.

“Skeletor frozen in ice” – We can only hope that Heman was also frozen in ice, to be thawed to combat the future menace, a la Demolition Man.

“awesome” – I don’t know what they thought they would find googling this term, but I’m glad my website came up in the search! I’d like to think it was the first result.

“the awesomest guy ever” – Two hits on this! Two! Thank you for the recognition Google! 🙂

“is this thing on dating website” – I’m not exactly an eligible bachelor, but maybe we could set something up for single commenters? Do I have any single commenters?

“stuffed animal bacon” – The hard part is cooking it long enough to make it crispy. However, I have to admit, Oliver does have a stuffed animal bacon.

“black and asian couples” – Boy, Sara and I to a “T”, I tell you.

“word for “things were better in the old days”” – Is there such a word? If so, I’d like to know it.

“where’s oliver?” – Must be getting desperate if you’re resorting to Google searches. Well, you found him!

“famous black man” – I’m so happy to think that someone searching for famous black men, instead found Sean Connery. Or, maybe it was Sara googling to find the name “Sean Connery”, and she succeeded.

“big sticky wad” – What do you suppose they were looking for? Why do you think they found me?

“hp lovecraft dinner party” – I hope they came to my website looking for my contact information for an invitation, because that sounds awesome!

“t-rex lick people” – I don’t believe that is historically accurate.

“kale chips jokes” – That’s pretty specific. I wracked my brain trying to come up with a kale chips joke to put here, and I think it’s just not possible.

“funny threats” – I’m going to kill you with a rubber chicken! Drown you in seltzer water! Slap you in the face with a poison cream pie!

“i-like-it-salty shane” – That’s right baby. I like it salty. (I really can’t deny, I do like salty things. Salty things.)

He’s not moving!

/ Shane / Leave a comment

Have you ever come up on someone who’s sleeping a little *too* deeply, and they look like they were dead? Yeah, well, this pillow‘s not going to help you with that. But it is going to help you freak people out, and what more is there to life?

Geek and Sundry

/ Shane / 2 Comments

Can we first just take a minute to acknowledge how awesome it is that, in this day and age, someone can just go on the Internet and start their own television network? And I’m not talking about some kind of crappy home-movies, I’m talking about full production budgets with costumes real actors and witty writing. I’m talking about Geek & Sundry.

Geek & Sundry is the youtube channel of Internet royalty Felicia Day (if you know her from nowhere else, you should at least recognize her as Penny from Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog).

My introduction to Geek & Sundry actually came via one of the shows on the Geek & Sundry network, TableTop. I used to love a show called Celebrity Poker Showdown, in which celebrities played poker against each other while throwing out hilarious one liners. TableTop is like that, except instead of regular celebrities, they have geek celebrities, and instead of poker, they play geek board games. The show is hosted by none other than the king of the Internet himself, Wil Wheaton.

I anticipate watching TableTop to learn about awesome new games that I’ve never played before. However, I’m also excited to watch episodes where they play games that I know and love, such as Settlers of Catan:

However, once I was there on the Geek & Sundry network, I started to check out some of the other shows. I swear that someone has tried to get me to watch The Guild before, but I couldn’t find any reference in my email, so I guess it never really happened. However, The Guild is HILARIOUS and awesome, so someone should have recommended it to me if they didn’t. This show is as good as anything you’d find on traditional television, and a must-see if you are a gamer, or know a gamer, or even know what a mmorpg is. There are 6 seasons currently, but a whole season is about an hour long.

But I didn’t stop there! Geek & Sundry led me on to the fantasy and science fiction show Sword and Laser. They’re starting a book club, and they just so happen to have picked The Magicians by Lev Grossman as their first book. I just so happen to be about half way through The Magicians by Lev Grossman. Kismet. This is a book that I have heard tons about, and I’m very excited to read. And now I’m in a book club, which is a first for me.

There are other shows worth being excited about as well, such as Written by a Kid, which hasn’t premiered yet (fantastic premise, professional animators provide animations for stories told by kids).

Anyway, long story short, we have gotten to the point where there are a lot of non-traditional media streams out there, which leads to highly targeted, highly specialized sources that are apparently highly attuned to my own individual wavelength.

In other words, Geek and Sundry.

Technology: our advantage over the undead

/ Shane / 6 Comments

They might have unflagging strength and endurance as well as overwhelming numbers, but what they do not have is reliable Internet access.

Jump on the zombie survival map at Map of the Dead, and get your location in Google maps highlighted with nearby zombie survival necessities, such as gun stores, outdoor stores, grocery stores, hardware stores,  hospitals and pharmacies, and other areas of interest such as harbors, police stations and liquor stores. Oh yeah, cemeteries are clearly marked as well.

Looking at the map, I realize I’m totally screwed. First off, I live in a food desert, so there’s not going to be much to scavenge. There isn’t much retail, and no stores that would be of use to me. I do live close to a hospital and a harbor, but those things are about equidistant from me, with an enormous cemetery in the third direction.

Doesn’t look good folks.

Anybody have a particularly good or particularly bad location?

Anyone for a meat pie?

/ Shane / 1 Comment

Has there ever been a headline as awesome as “Brazil Cannibal Sect Makes Human Empanadas“? Wait a minute, this story sounds a little bit familiar…

Ladies and gentlemen
May I have your attention, please?
Are your nostrils aquiver and tingling as well as that delicate, lushious, ambrosial smell?
yes, they are, I can tell
Well, ladies and gentlemen
that aroma enriching the breeze,
is like something compared to its succulent source
as the gourmets among you will tell you, of course.
Ladies and gentlemen you can’t imagine the rapture in store,
just inside of this door!
There, you’ll sample Mrs.Lovett’s meat pies. Savory and sweet pies, as you’ll see.
You who eat pies, Mrs. Lovetts meat pies, conjure up the treat pies used to be!

God that’s good.

Tip via Sara.