Evie: “Can an iPhone call people too?” – Not as far as I can tell.

::Oliver buckling his baby into the high chair and lovingly feeding him::
::Blender starts::
Oliver: “Smoothie time! Smoothie time! Baby, get out!”
::Throws his baby on the floor::

Me: “Ugh, I hate dishes.”
Sara: “And yet, you still eat.”

::Oliver was sick::
Sara: “Oh Oliver, I hope this is your worst day.”
Evie, aghast: “Mama! Tell him to have a good day!”