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[Stuff] my dad says

/ Shane / Leave a comment

Did you ever know someone who just says funny things? Just a quote generating machine? Well, thanks to the Internet, you don’t have to enjoy this person all by your lonesome anymore. Take 29 year old Justin, who lives with his 73 year old curmudgeon father. He just takes the things his dad says on a daily basis and throws them up on a twitter account, and just like that he got a T.V. deal.

*Warning* The *ahem* [stuff] his dad says can be a bit profane and/or vulgar. His dad doesn’t have much of a filter on his mouth, which is part of what makes this so funny! I edited the ones below.

So here is a random sampling. Click on the link above to read pages and pages of this stuff. It is hilarious and addicting.

  • “Son, no one gives a [crap] about all the things your cell phone does. You didn’t invent it, you just bought it. Anybody can do that.”
  • “The baby will talk when he talks, relax. It ain’t like he knows the cure for cancer and he just ain’t spitting it out.”
  • “Here’s a strawberry, sorry for farting near you…Hey! Either take the strawberry and stop [complaining], or no strawberry, that’s the deal.”
  • “The worst thing you can be is a liar….Okay fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but THEN, number two is liar. Nazi 1, Liar 2”
  • “Your mother rented this film, What Happens In Vegas. I thought it was going to be non-fiction, but it’s fiction, and it’s about some idiot.”
  • “Don’t touch the bacon, it’s not done yet. You let me handle the bacon, and i’ll let you handle…what ever it is you do. I guess nothing.”

Who needs a phone charger?

/ Shane / Leave a comment

Now this is some cool technology! Basically, Nokia has come up with a way to harvest ambient radio waves and turn it into electricity to charge the battery of your phone. In other words, your cell phone could slowly recharge in your pocket and could essentially stay in standby mode forever, without ever needing to be recharged. Think of all the energy that is roaming around us via cell phone towers, power lines, radio transmissions, etc. that is going to waste. Tapping into and using that otherwise wasted power is like finding another natural resource. That’s thinking green!

Going a completely different direction now, I came across this humorous article about people who start Twitter accounts, post just one message, and quit. That article led to this blog about “1 post wonders“, that is, people who make blogs with only 1 post, never to post again.

Hopefully reading a few of those blogs will help you appreciate my blog a little more. 😉

When it rains, it pours…Zombies

/ Shane / 2 Comments

For some reason things come together in a perfect storm such that I get a bunch of links pertaining to the same subject all at the same time. And in this case, the subject is zombies.

First things first, I we have a possible zombie attack on our hands, and thanks to technology we have been given advance warning. In this case it is the twitter account of the Boston PD:

INJURED OFFICER: Officer from district 4 transported to Beth Israel Hospital, human bite to arm, suspect in custody.

Twitter user willcady used the opportunity to ask the police a burning question:

@Boston_Police if that was a zombie bite, would you tell us?

The police, setting the gold standard for government transparency, answered him:

@willcady Yes, absolutely

Suuuuuure they will.  Be aware! Link courtesy NBH.

Second off was the zombie movie news that was all over the place last week. Apparently someone threw together a zombie movie for $70 and it is getting rave reviews. Now, to be fair, the $70 thing is kind of a white lie. Sure, maybe he only spent $70, but (for example) they had special effects leftovers from the set of Wolverine donated. It’s not like I could go out and make the same movie with only $70. Nevertheless, it was a very, very cheap movie. What did they spend the $70 on?

“We bought a crowbar and a couple of tapes, and I think we got some tea and coffee as well — not the expensive stuff either, the very basic kind,” Price told CNN. “Just to keep the zombies happy.”

Always a good idea.

Finally, I will leave you with two zombie related games.

The first, Plants vs. Zombies, combines two of my favorite things, zombies and tower defense. I saw a review of this pop up in several places, so it seems to be somewhat popular. The only problem is, it costs $20. But they do have a free trial you can download and install that lets you play the regular game for 60 minutes. And it was a lot of fun! I was extremely disappointed when my trial was up.

If you don’t feel like actually playing the game, you can watch a preview instead:

Finally, I leave you with a free game, Zombie Hooker Nightmare. The title should give you a clue about this one. Basically, you play a ::ahem:: lady of the night who is just trying to make an honest living if only these dang zombies would leave her alone! I find it kind of ironic, since she doesn’t seem to have a lot of brains to tempt them.

Link courtesy Tony Vegas.

Superbowl Tweets

/ Shane / 3 Comments

For those of you not familiar with the world of Twitter, be happy.  It is kind of a cross between old school away messages and new school facebook status updates.  Basically, on your twitter, you put up little one word sentences or pictures (called “tweets”) that describe what you are doing at any given moment. “Hey, I had eggs for breakfast this morning” or “The guy in front of me in Starbucks right now is annoying” or “here is a picture to demonstrate the color of my toe fungus” or “right now, as you are reading this, I’m dropping a massive deuce”.  As you can see, there’s virtually no reason for this technology to exist! But, then again, since you are reading my blog right now and it is essentially the same thing just in long form; I don’t have much room to complain.

Okay, now that the explanations are out of the way, check this out.  Basically they monitored all superbowl related messages on twitter.  The more a word was mentioned, the larger the word appears on the map. The words also appear on the map geographically where they were sent.  So, for example, you see a lot of “Steelers” up by Pennsylvania and a lot of “Cardinals” down by Arizona. You can hit “play” and walk through time as the game progresses.  Important events of the game are marked on the timeline.  So, for example, right after the Cardinals score, you will see all of a sudden everybody uses the word “Cardinals”.  Boy, as I write that it doesn’t sound that interesting, but I swear it is!  I guess you have to see it.  Also, the words are color coded red or black for the Cardinals or Steelers respectively, where applicable.

You can also mess around with the filters on the left hand side.  My favorite is filtering on player names.  Larry Fitzgerald didn’t do much at the beginning of the game, but then blew up at the end.  So you see his name showing up more and more until it just *explodes* at the end.  A scary one is to do the commercials filter and see what effect the commercials had on the minds of America. And the commercials weren’t even that good this year!

Link courtesy InteractiveReader.