Alex: “In the night, you’re hot and dry, but I like it in the morning when you are like hot and moist and soggy.”
Evelyn: “All day long, while we’ve been doing stuff, my [Chinese] penpal has been sleeping.”
Alex: “Is she nocturnal?”
::Alex quietly sobbing::
Me: “What’s the matter?”
Alex: “I just love Mama so much.”
Me: “I love you so much, did you know that?”
Alex: “Well I love you just okay.”
Alex: “Why are you laughing?”
Me: “It’s kind of mean to say you love Mama so much and me just okay.”
Alex: “Well…I love you a LOT just okay.”
::Showing Oliver a piece of paper with a drawing he made on it::
Me: “Did you draw this?”
Oliver: “You can delete it.”
I mean, this is the boy who tried to use an Etch-a-sketch as a touch screen, so….
Alex: “Aphrodite must have made me because I love mama!”
Sara: “The garage door just opened and closed.”
Sara: “…I guess that’s what amounts to news these days.”
Alex: “Daddy’s going to get old and die first because he’s already 40.”
Alex: “What’s that word…exertaining?”
Alex: “Yeah, entertaining! Entertaining me is more important than talking to Evelyn.”
We were on a Zoom meeting with 200+ young kids, and it was a madhouse, everybody talking at once. Total chaos. Finally, having had enough, the flustered moderator muted everybody…including the person who was supposed to be presenting. Into the sudden, total, deafening silence came the moderator’s crystal clear, “Shit!”
In this time of quarantine, the Getty had a fun challenge to explore your creativity and keep from going crazy. The idea was simple: find a work of art from the Getty and recreate it using items you have around the house. If you haven’t seen these, do a quick search; you will not regret it! I absolutely love the time and creativity people are putting into these!
Ollie’s teacher “assigned” the challenge to his class, and I was positively begging him to pick something with two people in it, so I could get in on the action too. He didn’t go for it, but instead selected and recreated one all on his own. I was blown away; it is just absolutely perfect!
After seeing his I was even MORE determined to create my own, so I convinced Alex to help me out. He was such a good sport. He sat there holding that apple to his mouth for like 5 minutes while we arranged everything. Afterwards I said I would eat the apple and he was like, “Uh…I drooled on that apple. A lot.”
Evelyn missed out on the fun, so naturally she wanted to do one as well. At this point, our staging was starting to get a bit elaborate…
Some of you have done some of your own, and they are *A*M*A*Z*I*N*G*! Keep them coming!
Alex: “Can you take off your glasses? I’m going to be on your head a lot.”
Person who doesn’t wish to be named: “The elephants were humongous! They were bigger than DAD!”
I mean, I know it’s hard to believe, but an elephant is actually *slightly* bigger than me.
Sara, walking outside: “There’s another Covid coin. It’s a penny. I’m leaving the pennies, but I’d get Covid for a dime.”
So the other day I was reading to Alex from Ramona the Pest, by Beverly Cleary. For the most part it holds up. Still a great book. However, there are times when you can definitely tell this book was written in a different age.
Last night there was a particular scene, when Ramona’s sister Beezus has a dentist appointment. Ramona’s mom tells Ramona that she’s got to stay home by herself until quarter past 8, and then walk herself to school, and then just leaves to take Beezus to the dentist. Ramona, being in KINDERGARTEN, is not exactly clear on what “quarter past 8” means, and accidentally leaves late, arriving after school has already started. The whole thing is presented very matter of fact, as if to say “ha ha, kids are so dumb! They can’t even get themselves to kindergarten by themselves!”
WHAT. THE. HECK??
Look, I know it was a different time and all, but it wasn’t THAT different. Did people actually do this in the 60s? Just be like, “alright kid, you’re 5 years old…guess you’re on your own!” Ah, kindergarten…time to push that baby bird out of the nest and let them learn to fly, am I right?
You can accuse modern parents of “helicoptering” all you want, but telling a kid who doesn’t even yet know how to tell time she’s responsible for getting herself out the door and to school on her own seems a little bit crazy. On the other hand, I don’t know; maybe kindergarteners really were capable of that kind of independence once upon a time. Maybe my “modern sensibilities” are stunting the growth of my kids?
Or, maybe the 60s was a lawless time where parents were INSANE??
The initial estimates for Covid-19, if left unchecked, were around 1.4 million deaths in the United States; the total cumulative deaths in the US from ALL wars, all the way back to the Revolutionary War, is about 1.35 million*. Even though we are no longer looking at that worst case scenario, the fact that this had the power to kill more people than every war combined is really messing with my head right now.
The most current, much more conservative estimates (which include social distancing measures), still have the US exceeding 93k deaths. That’s nearly twice the US death total from the Vietnam war (56k), and almost 3 times the death total from the Korean War (36k).
It does not take much imagination to think we might exceed the US death total from World War I (116k).
I think about those wars and what a profound effect they had on the US, and on the world. Titanic shifts that changed everything about our country, our politics, our industries…we are currently experiencing something that is potentially several times larger.
WWII was ~400k, so we may or may not get there, but it’s just….wow.
Stay at home, kids.
*Numbers come from here; I am using the Total US Deaths number, rather than the Total US Casualties number, because those numbers also include the wounded.
Alex: “Too bad for the coronavirus because I like to eat snow!”
We all have to suffer in these trying times.
Sara: “Okay, the three books and the googly eyes will arrive Wednesday night.”
So I guess we’re all set for a global pandemic then! What more could one need?
Alex: “Can you just stop making me baked goods??”
Yes sir, reaaaaly suffering over here…