Me: “He hasn’t changed in years.”
Sara: “Not even his shirt.”
Me: “Her magic pajamas can’t help her now!” – in reference to card mojo
Laurie: “Are those pantyhose full of oatmeal in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?”
Evie, retrieving her long lost stuffed bear: “Will you be lonely without the bear?”
Grandma Butterfly: “Yeah, I won’t have anybody to sleep with.”
Evie: “Ha ha. You’re all alone.”
Evie: “Do bears like bees?”
Me: “Umm…”
Evie: “Because then I would marry one. I like bees and I want to marry someone who likes bees.”
Me: “So you would marry a bear?”
Evie: “If he liked bees.”
Me, singing to Evie: “You’ll go down in history!”
Evie: “No. Herstory.”
Dad: “I have a good trivia question for you! Who originally wrote and sang Frosty the Snowman?”
::thinking::
Me: “I don’t know, I give up. Who?”
Dad: “I don’t know. I told you it would be a good trivia question!”
Sara: “Evie, can you pick up that fuzz ball on the floor?”
Evie: “Where is it?”
Sara: “It’s right there.”
Evie: “I can’t see it, I don’t have my glasses!”
I think she was spending too much time with Grandpa Johnny!
Evie, opening her stocking: “It’s candy! From Trader Joe’s!”
Sara: “Wow, Santa shops at Trader Joe’s too??”
You know, it’s one thing to recognize the Target logo, but the Trader Joe’s logo? (Though I admit, they have a distinctive font.)
Evie, playing with a bike bell: “I think I used up all the batteries.”
Evie, unwrapping a shirt that says, “My Aunt Rocks”: “But I don’t have an Aunt Rock!”
Evie, riding her new balance bike down the hall: “Daddy, help! Oliver’s chasing me and I can’t get away!”
I’ll give her this, he is crawling a lot faster these days. And the only one who seems to like that bike more than Evie, is Oliver. So he is able to crawl about as fast as she can go on there.
Grandma S: “I see you gave Oliver your old barn.”
Evie: “It was my parents’ decision.”
Sara: “I’m going to make a smoothie.”
Evie: “A chocolate smoothie!”
Sara: “No, I’m making banana.”
Evie: “But I’m dying for chocolate!”
Evie: “You can put on lotion AFTER I’m in bed. This is my commandment!” – Where did she even learn that word from? (And it wasn’t from school, that was my first thought too, but I asked her)
Evie’s been having a lot of “bad dreams” lately (the quotes represent the fact that I think a lot of them are an excuse to get me down there because she’s lonely). Her dreams can be kind of strange. Certainly I have had dreams that were scary at the time, and then silly when I woke up, but here are a few that stood out:
Evie: “A cow jumped over a fence and turned you and Oliver into cows! And then you ran away!”
Evie, practically in tears: “We were walking and the floor was covered with caterpillar puke!”
They’re not all bad though:
Evie: “Daddy, I had an exciting dream! Santa Claus had a baby! A baby boy! He wore a Santa hat!”
Evie, discovering her glow stick was still glowing from the day before: “It’s a miracle!!”
Meredith: “…and then we moved here.”
Evie: “How did you lift the house?”
Evie, on her 3rd doughnut hole: “It’s not dessert daddy, it’s just bread with sugar on it!”
Evie: “You’re the beast, daddy!”
Me: “Raar! My first victim will be this innocent little boy!”
::gobbling up Oliver::
Evie: “No, no! Don’t eat him, that’s my brother!”
Me: “What will you offer me in trade for him?”
Evie: “…my cat?”
Obviously a skilled negotiator in the making.
Shane Halbach 