Grandpa Tom: “I don’t want to get in trouble when mama comes home.”
Evie: “We can run away and never come back!”

Grandpa Johnny: “You seen one pair of [breasts] you’ve seen them all. Right girl?”
Evie: “Right!” – You just can’t beat wildly inappropriate advice from Grandpa Johnny.

Evie: “Issue! Someone has to lift me over Luna.” – Someone’s got to raise these issues.

Dan’s skydiving instructor: “You start screaming ‘No No No’ it sure the hell sounds like ‘Go Go Go’ to me, and I’m going to say rock on! Let’s do it!” – I wasn’t even there, and I think this guy might be my new hero.

We were picking apples, and Evie was eating them right off the tree. She really liked them. ALL of them.

Evie: “The apple was so good, I forgot about the core!”