The monitor volume button must have gotten bumped last night, so this morning the volume was completely off. Therefore, I missed my usual wakeup call at 6:42 when Evie starts hollering that the butterfly lights are on. I was snoozing blissfully until 7:30. I woke up and blinked sleepily at the clock. “Why is it 7:30?” I asked Sara. Puzzled, I picked up the monitor and discovered the sound was off. When I turned the volume up, I heard Evie mournfully sobing, “Please come soon, it’s been a long time!”

Oh man. I tell you, I felt about as bad as I have ever felt. This poor girl had been calling for me for about 45 minutes and I wasn’t coming. The butterfly lights had already been on and then turned off by the time I got down there. I don’t think I’ve ever not come before, so she was probably very worried and confused. I asked her several times why she didn’t come upstairs and wake me up (she has done this on other occasions), but she said she was afraid to come out of her room. Double guilt trip! Nothing gets to me more than when Evie says she’s afraid of the hallway or the monsters in the laundry room, etc.

I tried to make up for it with extra hugs and stuff, but tonight when I was putting her to bed, she said, “Don’t forget to come when the butterfly lights are on!” making me feel awful all over again. She also kept repeating, “I didn’t forget to call you when the lights are on, I won’t wait until they are off.” She’s obviously very worried that I will forget again tomorrow.

It’s funny how such a small thing can make you feel so bad!