And now that means you can be anything at all! Check this thing out! Download pictures and / or text from the Internet and it will burn them into your toast!
The possibilities are endless!
Link courtesy Ichiban News.
Eye Jewelry
I have this eye thing. I don’t like to touch them, I don’t like to see them touched, I don’t even really like to see a close up picture of them. It just freaks me out and makes my eyes water. Of course, knowing this, some people think it is quite hilarious to send me links and pictures of exactly that sort of thing. So, recently I’ve received a couple of crazy links. The thing is, I don’t doubt for a second that this is real. People do way crazier things all the time!
The first is related to putting tiny diamonds in your contacts. It actually looks kind of cool, if you forget about the fact that diamonds can cut anything, even eyeballs.
The second one is a little bit crazier. I can hardly watch this video. I don’t know why you would want to do this one though because it seems so much more annoying and it doesn’t even really look cool!
Blackberries
I just don’t get them. I mean I can totally understand wanting to have the Internet on your person at all times, ala the iPhone. Those things are awesome. Looking up directions and menus and “who was the guy who was in that movie…” type questions whenever you want cannot be beat. It is straight out of the future.
"Saaaam! Ziggy says you only have a 50% chance of winning in your Fantasy Football league! He also has movie times and directions for you."
But I don’t really understand the desire to be plugged into your work email all the time. Unless you are a CEO or some sort of stock trader or something, I just can’t see what is so important that it can’t wait until you get back to work or back to your hotel or something. I guess Blackberry has done a good job with marketing. Very clearly iPhones are for hippies and Blackberries are for fancy-pants business people.
One of these guys uses a Blackberry
I guess that is what I don’t like about them; they are so pretentious. Somehow when I see someone using an iPhone I know he is probably wasting time and I am okay with that. When I see someone using a Blackberry, he is just wasting time too, but he is *pretending* that he is not. Oh no, instead he is doing important business things because he is a very important business man, yesh he is! If you were talking to someone and they got an email on their iPhone, they wouldn’t stop talking to you because of it. But if they get an email on their Blackberry, then stop everything! It could be someone demanding a business decision that could make billions of dollars for the company! But come on, I know some of the people who carry Blackberries…someone probably sent them some lolcatz.
But the worst most pretentious part about them is receiving an email from them. Down on the bottom it automatically inserts a little thing that says, “Sent via Blackberry”. Now what is that all about? It is just another way to let you know that the person with the Blackberry is so very, very important and busy. They’re responding to you on the go! They’re probably going from one multi-million dollar deal to the next!
Why would you care where I sent you an email from? I don’t tell you when I’m emailing from my laptop as opposed to my desktop. I could see if it was something really cool or important like, “Sent from the back of a Tyrannosaurus Rex” or something, but you know what? In that case go ahead and include it in the text of the message.
So, that is why I will now be adding to all outgoing emails, “Sent by someone who is very hmm hmm hmm”. That way I know that you know that I am extremely busy and important and the effort I had to put forth to send you the email was extreme. I just hope it didn’t cost my company some billion dollar deal just to forward you a chain letter.
How to develop your time sense
Okay, this link courtesy of Sara who thinks she is so funny.
As you know, I have absolutely no sense of time. Hours pass by and I think it has been mere minutes. If you asked me what time it is at any given moment, my guess could be off by as much as two hours.
So apparently, Google’s tip of the day was about developing your time sense. It actually is sort of interesting. Basically you just constantly guess what time it is and then check to see if you are right. Then over time you will discover how far off you are and then you can take that into account. I make no claims as to whether this works or not, and I probably won’t even try it, but there it is nonetheless.
Anyway, having no time sense has it’s advantages! Everything seems like it is at most 2 hours from me! My commute seems to take no time at all! I’m constantly surprised when I discover it is an hour earlier than I thought it was!
First Football Weekend
Well, the first weekend of football is over and my fantasy football season is already sunk.
I’m only in one league this year. That league is my keeper league that I’ve been playing in since 2002. Every year you select the 2 best players from your team the previous year and keep them into the next season. Last year I won the league and the main reason why was Tom Brady. Obviously I kept him for this season. After netting me a grand total of 2.53 points he received a season ending knee injury. I don’t mean to be callous about a guy with a serious injury, but lets face it, he is paid extremely will because of the risk. But consider how his injury affects ME! An entire season of fun down the tubes. And not just me, it has been estimated that Brady’s injury will shift $150 MILLION dollars of Fantasy Football winnings to different people. Economics are weird.
In other football news, I watched the first quarterback since 1992 not named Brett Favre start a football game for the Green Bay Packers. And actually, he was pretty awesome. Not awesome in the fact that he was unstoppable, but considering it was his first start ever he looked like an old hand. Despite the fact that many penalties put him in bad situations, he played very well and against a team that many people picked to go to the superbowl. Certainly against a tough defense. He made plays when he had to, he never looked rattled, and he displayed traits (especially eye techniques used to freeze or move safeties) that some veteran quarterbacks never master.
I always had complete faith in Rodgers, but I think the rest of the world now sees what most of the Packers’ faithful saw a long time ago…that the team is honestly really good and in no small part because of Aaron Rodgers.
